so, the xmas vaca was great. didn't really know what to do with myself day to day, but in the end it was a great relaxing time. i randomly went here and there between friends and randomness. ended up spending time at the firehouse for xmas eve since nick was working. spent xmas day with sarah until nick got home from work, but we had a good time - some good discussion. then i went to sarah's house again for new years. i felt a little out of place being surrounded by a bunch of medics, but ultimately it was a good time. other than that i just relaxed, and it was great.
i won't lie though, yesterday sucked, but it was only because i knew i had to come back to work and the morons i have to deal with today. sooooo not happy about it. the past couple weeks i've realized that i think i have my meds figured out. but i also realized that i think part of the reason why i have had such a tough time adjusting is because i am MISERABLE EVERY DAY at work. when you're miserable during what you spend most of your time on, you aren't going to be a happy person. I HATE IT HERE! that's what i've figured out. it just brings me down. so i'm back to listening to music and drowning them out, hopefully i can keep that up for the next 9 months til this job is supposed to be done...it's gonna be a long 9 months.
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I had to come to this realization a few times: maybe its not the meds...maybe its the environment.
ReplyDeleteI had to change who I was around a handful of times. The times I didn't, I was forced to learn techniques to make it more tolerable. Can you listen to an Ipod or something while you are there so you can't hear Bozo snoring next door?
As for the holiday---totally LOVED spending it with you. Everyone loved you at the party. Said you were very personable. (And loved the tape story...) Know anyone that can fix a dining room wall? LOL!