so, i've been feeling good, but within the last 2 hours i've suddenly got the overwhelming and heavy chest feeling again. and i feel like it's because i'm doing something important for the job here at the bridge (an estimate, where all the numbers have to be right and you can't mess up, otherwise you have to jump through numerous hoops and headaches to fix it). i feel like a huge weight is on my shoulders and if i mess up the world will end, even though i know i'm being careful and thurough - cause i already caught some mistakes that my manager did. i don't know why i feel like this. i never got anxious over stuff like this until recently cause it's what i do, and i know i do it well...but for some reason i feel like i'm gonna mess it up and get in trouble and cause problems for someone else.
ugh. so, i took some anti anxiety stuff in hopes i don't freak out today. again, so weird and frustrating.
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Someone told me to hum to yourself. Once you get a song in your head you lose focus of the "anxiety" issue and just deal with the song stuck in your head. I haven't tried it yet but I know it works with me if I'm chewing gum (like a cow). I listen to the gum pop in my mouth and I lose the anxiety issue, chew like a cow, and move on with whatever job it is. Who knows...its worth a try.
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